Dr. Muhammad Hussein Aboud Al-Tai / College of Islamic Sciences, University of Karbala

Allah, the Almighty, said: “And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him with hardship upon hardship, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the final return” (Luqman 14).

This verse contains two values: the first is gratitude to Allah, and the second is gratitude to the parents. Although the conjunction “wa” (and) in the phrase “to Me and to your parents” indicates equality in gratitude, and a person must thank both Allah and his parents equally, this does not mean that we should overlook the fact that the value of gratitude to Allah takes precedence over the gratitude to the parents.

The reason lies in the fact that gratitude to Allah, as a higher value, is essentially gratitude that benefits the person. Allah said: “And whoever is grateful – his gratitude is only for [the benefit of] himself. And whoever denies [His favor] – then indeed, my Lord is Free of need, Generous.” (An-Naml 40), and He also said: “And We certainly gave Luqman wisdom, [saying], ‘Be grateful to Allah; and whoever is grateful – his gratitude is only for [the benefit of] himself. And whoever denies [His favor] – then indeed, Allah is Free of need, Praiseworthy.” (Luqman 12). Moreover, Allah gives gratitude a dimension that encompasses both the blessings of this world and the Hereafter. He says: “And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed: ‘If you are grateful, I will surely increase your favor; but if you deny, indeed, My punishment is severe.’” (Ibrahim 7).

Thus, gratitude to Allah—regardless of the form it takes—is gratitude that returns to the person himself. Then comes gratitude to the parents as a reminder to reflect on the blessings of having parents, their hardships, services, and rights. Therefore, gratitude to parents has been placed on the same level as gratitude to Allah. Just as Allah has the prior favor in the existence of the human being and the creation of life, so too do parents have a favor in the existence of the child. Without them—as a material cause—there would be no physical existence for the child in this world. Therefore, the verse initially points to the immense favor of parents, leading to the command to honor them, recalling the mother’s suffering during pregnancy and breastfeeding. As Allah says: “And if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them. But accompany them in this world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me is your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.” (Luqman 15).

This verse contains three values crystallized in three commands that the child is expected to follow if he is faced with parents who are polytheists, striving to make him associate partners with Allah. These values are embodied in three divine commands that must be followed. The first value is not to yield to them or obey them in associating others with Allah, as Allah says: “Do not obey them.” Despite the high status and great attention Allah has given to parents, as He linked worship and monotheism with kindness to them, Allah commands His servant not to obey them in this matter. This is because associating partners with Allah is a grievous wrong that obscures the mind and disables its faculties in pursuing the paths to human perfection through the worship of Allah. Additionally, there is no obedience to any creature in disobedience to the Creator.

Indeed, not obeying the parents in associating others with Allah is an educational value that elevates the child’s intellect and purifies him from the filth of blind imitation that his parents may have taught him. This value precedes the second value, which is to accompany the parents with kindness in this world, as Allah says: “And accompany them in this world with kindness.” This means to treat them with kindness that is approved by the Sharia, which includes good character, patience, tolerance of hardships, benevolence, and maintaining ties of kinship, because their right is derived from the right of Allah.

From here, following the path of the Prophet (peace be upon him and his family) is a third educational value, which can serve as a divine compensation and a reward for the Muslim servant who did not obey his parents in polytheism but honored them and accompanied them with kindness in this world. This reward is embodied in the fatherhood of the Prophet (peace be upon him and his family). It is reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him and his family) said to Ali: “O Ali, you and I are the fathers of this nation.” Thus, anyone who loses the affection of his parents due to their polytheism is compensated by Allah with the fatherhood of the Prophet (peace be upon him and his family). Allah also said: “And do not turn your cheek in contempt toward people and do not walk through the earth exultantly. Indeed, Allah does not like everyone self-deluded and boastful. And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of voices is the voice of donkeys.” (Luqman 18-19). In this verse, there are four divine commands from Luqman (peace be upon him), which crystallize into educational values. These commands call upon the human being to elevate himself toward higher values and strive diligently to nurture them. They have been organized within a value system. The first of these is: “And do not turn your cheek in contempt toward people.” This means not to abase oneself before others out of greed for what they possess. The verse, therefore, serves as a call for a person to preserve his dignity and honor, refraining from begging and seeking the means of pride and self-respect, as these are high values. Indeed, “To Allah belongs the honor, and to His Messenger, and to the believers.” Thus, a believer should not humble himself. The second command is: “And do not walk upon the earth exultantly.” This means not to walk in arrogance, haughtiness, and pride. This encourages the individual to adopt a new value summarized in humility and avoiding arrogance. If we reflect, we find that the Qur’anic character invites the person to embody two values: the first is dignity, and the second is humility. Dignity precedes humility, as dignity in the servant’s heart discourages him from relying on others and strengthens his connection with Allah, preserving his status in the hearts of people through love and respect.